Elfleda invites Alwy in
One evening in late summer, Alwy Hogge came along the road after nightfall, on his way home from delivering a ham to the castle. He was taking his time, because there were so many shooting stars tonight and he was looking up at them as he walked, trying to count them, but he didn’t remember his numbers very well. He didn’t see Elfleda Wodehead until he almost tripped over her. He always blushed now when he saw Elfleda, and never knew what he was supposed to say to her.
“Good evening, Alwy. You’re out late.”
“Well, I guess you are too.”
“That’s right,” she laughed, “But I was about to go in and make dinner. Why don’t you come over and eat? I’ll make anything you like. Wouldn’t you like something besides pork for a change?”
“Well, I don’t know…” Alwy was confused. He only wanted to go home, but he knew it wasn’t nice to refuse an invitation.
“Come on, Alwy. You always like my cooking.”
“Well, that’s true…”
Before Alwy knew it, he was in Elfleda’s kitchen.
“Where’s Egelric?” he asked.
“Oh, he’s gone to town to set a date for the young Prince’s baptism.”
“He’s not here?”
“No, Alwy, he’s in town.”
Alwy didn’t feel so well. “Maybe I guess I should run along home. I bet Gunnie probably needs something.”
“Now Alwy, you won’t leave me here to eat my dinner alone? That wouldn’t be neighborly.”
“Well, I don’t know.”
“I know, Alwy, why don’t you build me a fire? The nights are starting to get chilly already. Won’t you please?”
That was more like it. Alwy knew how to build a fire.
“You certainly know how to build a fire, Alwy. I’ve never seen anyone build a fire like you. Let me see your hands.”
Alwy looked at his hands. Did he have dirt on them? Maybe Elfleda didn’t want him to touch her nice things.
“Let me see, Alwy,” she said softly.
“What strong hands you have, Alwy. I bet you’re a really strong man.”
“You bet! Why, I can wrestle my biggest hog to the ground all by myself. All you have to do is grab his ears and – ”
“How nice. I wonder if you could lift a person off the ground?”
“Well, sure I can. If the person weighs less than my hog, anyhow.”
“Try me and see.”
“Well, I don’t know – ”
But Elfleda was already in his arms. “You are strong! I’m not as heavy as your hog, but I can tell you are.”
Alwy really didn’t know what to do, so he just held her. “Maybe I can carry some wood for you or something?” he suggested.
“No, Alwy, no wood.”
“Sorry,” he said, dropping her back onto her feet. “I think I hear Gunnie calling for me.” Alwy didn’t like to tell a lie, but he didn’t know what else to do.
“I don’t hear anything,” Elfleda snapped.
Alwy paused. She must have known he was lying. He would have to be more careful.
“Tell me, Alwy, I bet your babies are really strong like you, aren’t they?”
“You bet they are! And real smart too! But I guess that’s Gunnie’s fault if they’re smart.”
“I don’t know, Alwy, I heard you weren’t always like this.”
“Well, I guess you’re right. My Da said I was a real smart kid before I hit my head.”
“That’s right, Alwy, and you and I both know how smart you are, even if you hit your head and now you get confused sometimes.”
“Well, I guess that’s so.”
“So tell me, Alwy, I guess you really love your babies, don’t you?”
“You bet I do! They’re real smart kids, and I – ”
“And I bet you want to have more, don’t you?”
“Well, I guess me and Gunnie will have more when the little ones get bigger. That’ll suit me fine.” Alwy’s head was starting to hurt. He didn’t understand what Elfleda wanted to talk about. He just wanted to go home and let Gunnilda handle this.
“Why don’t you have a baby with me?” she asked.
“Well, I don’t know,” Alwy said softly. Why couldn’t Gunnilda come?
“Come, Alwy. You know. Remember? You told me you know how babies were made.”
“I don’t know,” he repeated.
“Come, Alwy. A big, strong man like you doesn’t need to be afraid of little me.” She reached down and took his hand. “Don’t you want to make me happy?”
Alwy couldn’t make sense of this, but he was beginning to see what she wanted. Luckily, he saw a way out. “Why don’t you ask your husband, Elfleda?”
“My husband!” she hissed, drawing back.
“My husband! That snivelling fool, with his precious book, and his precious Duke, and his work all day and snore all night, and what does he give me but miserable weaklings that can’t even survive nine months in my belly?”
“Well, I guess that’s real mean, Elfleda. I think he’s real nice, and real smart too.”
“Oh! You idiot! Out! Get out, you! What was I ever thinking inviting you in here? Out!”
Alwy didn’t understand what had just happened, but he was relieved that he was finally able to make an exit.
He wanted to ask Gunnilda what he should do next time he saw Elfleda, but he was afraid somehow. He thought he might have done something wrong without meaning to. Still, there was something so disturbing about a woman who could coo one minute and hiss the next. Alwy was glad that Gunnilda was just plain old Gunnilda every day, even if her hair didn’t smell as nice as Elfleda’s.
