Alwy tries something new

Gunnilda hurriedly undressed and smoothed out the sheets before getting into bed. Alwy was stretched out on the floor in the other room next to Bertie, telling the children a story before bed: something with lots of bears and wolves and gore, by Bertie’s request. She was hoping that she would be able to fall asleep – or at least appear to – by the time Alwy came to bed.

But she would not be so lucky tonight.

“Hallo, Gunnie, you’re still awake,” Alwy said as he came in, before she had even had a chance to blow out the candle. “You missed a real good story.”

Gunnilda sighed and sat up.

“Say, Gunnie, I just ‘membered I wanted to tell you something.”

“What now, Alwy?”

“I talked to Father Brandt, and he says that a farmer’s boy can be a priest, just like I said.”

“That’s real good Alwy. Why don’t you ask Bertie if he wants to be?”

“Aw, Gunnie, I can’t do that. Bertie is my first boy, he has to get my farm. My second boy has to be a soldier, but I won’t have a second boy, so I got to have a third boy to be a priest. Don’t you think, Gunnie?”

“Oh, Alwy,” she sighed. “Not tonight, please.”

“Aw, Gunnie, how come?” he asked, slipping one arm behind her back. “You say that every night.”

“It’s too hot, Alwy. Can’t you wait till winter?”

“That’s a real long time, Gunnie.”

Gunnilda didn’t answer, and after a moment of silence from Alwy she opened her eyes and found him to have been intently studying her profile.

“You’re real pretty, Gunnie,” he said, laying a hesitant hand on her belly. “Why don’t you take off your shift?”

“Take off my shift?” she gasped. “Whatever for?”

“Well, I guess so I can see you.”

“You’ve seen me a hundred times in my bath!”

“That’s different.”

“How?”

Alwy pondered. “I don’t know. Maybe it’s so you won’t be so hot?”

“Oh, Alwy!” she groaned, sitting up. “Whatever you want! I’ll take off my shift, I’ll do whatever you want. Just – just do it.” She pulled her shift off over her head and tossed it onto the foot of the bed. 

For a moment she stood with her back to him. Alwy was right: he had seen her in her bath plenty of times but this was different, and she wasn’t sure she liked it. “Can I blow out the candle now?” she asked.

“Well, no, then I guess I couldn’t see you. Come here, Gunnie,” he called softly, reaching out with one hand to finger her hair.

The easiest thing seemed to be to get back into bed and pull him close to her, so he couldn’t see her after all.

“You’re soft!” he marveled.

“I guess that old shift is a little scratchy,” she said nervously.

“Lie down.” His voice was gentle, but there was no mistaking that it was a command. What had gotten into her poor Alwy? He never asked her anything without a whine.

As he laid her down and drew away from her, she suddenly felt unbearably naked, and her hand flew out to pull him back again.

But Alwy didn’t move. “You are pretty!” he admired, looking down her body.

“Stop!” she sobbed, and threw both arms around his neck to pull him down on top of her. Let him kiss her and get on with it. Then she could get dressed again – then he would leave her in peace and she could curl up and sleep.

But Alwy didn’t even kiss her the way he normally did – his lips left her mouth to wander over her cheeks and eyelids and neck, and his hands wandered still farther afield. What was the matter with him? What was he trying to do to her?

And then, “Ow – ow – ow! What are you doing? Alwy, you’re hurting me! Stop it! Stop it!” She was trying not to wake the children, but finally, panicked, she shrieked, “Get off of me!” 

She managed to push him off and scrambled away from him to sit, breathless, on the edge of the bed. “What’s the matter with you?” she hissed after she had mastered her trembling body.

“You didn’t like that?” Alwy asked miserably.

“Like it? I was supposed to like it? Whatever put that idea into your thick head?” She realized with a pang that it was the first time she had ever insulted his intelligence.

“Egelric said you would.”

“Egelric?” she choked, leaping to her feet. “Egelric?” she asked again, unable to believe she had heard correctly.

“What does this mean, Alwy?” she asked, her voice barely more than a whisper. She grabbed her shift and jerked it on.

“I asked him what I should do,” he mumbled. “I thought maybe I must be doing something wrong.”

“You asked Egelric about this?” she hissed. “You asked Egelric about me?”

She shook all over with rage and humiliation. “You dared!”

“I’m sorry, Gunnie, I didn’t know it was wrong,” he whimpered.

She tried to move past him to the bedroom door, but he held out his arms as if he meant to embrace her.

“Don’t touch me! Don’t you ever touch me again!” she snarled. She brushed past him and stepped over Bertie to get to the door outside.

“Da!” Bertie called from the other room a few minutes later. “Where’s Ma going?”

“I don’t know, Bertie,” he called soothingly, “but she’ll be back real soon. You just go back to sleep.”