Egelric 'pologizes

“Ah, Bertie, don’t look at me with those eyes,” Egelric sighed. “I know.”

“Hallo, Egelric,” Bertie said softly. “Come in, please. Hallo, Baby!” he added, opening the door wide.

“Where’s your Ma, Bertie?” Egelric asked. “I’ve come to ‘pologize, as Baby says. I suppose I should ‘pologize to you, too, Bertie, for yelling at your Ma.”

“Ma said she don’t feel good. She’s lyin’ down in her bed. She said she don’t want to be bothered.”

“Ah, I see,” Egelric said. “Perhaps you can just ask her if it would be a bother for her to see me for a moment?”

But Iylaine had taken matters into her own little hands and had already gone back into the bedroom.

“Gunnie,” she whispered, “My Da is here to ‘pologize.”

“He is?” Gunnilda asked.

“Baby!” Egelric called softly from the door. “You shouldn’t be in here.”

“It’s all right, Egelric,” Gunnilda said, sitting up.

“Don’t get up, Gunnilda. I didn’t know you were resting—I didn’t want to disturb you.”

“Pish! I shouldn’t be lazing around like a fat old tomcat. Baby, you go play with Bertie a while. Let me talk to your Da.”

“Egelric,” she said once Iylaine had gone out, “I want to ‘pologize, like Baby says.”

“That’s what I came to do,” he smiled.

“She told me. But you needn’t have got mad if I hadn’t got in that chest. I shouldn’t have did that—”

“Perhaps—I don’t know. Baby doesn’t seem to think it should matter. Perhaps she knows best. But I was dreadful, wasn’t I? You only wanted to do something kind, and I thanked you by being rather cruel.”

“Maybe you just got too used to that.”

“To what?”

“I shouldn’t have said that,” she said, her hand flying to her lips.

“Wait a moment—what do you mean?”

“I shouldn’t say anything bad about Elfleda…” she murmured, confused.

“What do you know about that?” he asked softly.

It was a difficult question, but he didn’t seem angry, and so she explained. “Well, I guess I only know what Baby told…” she began.

“What did she tell you?”

“Well, I guess Elfleda wasn’t always real kind with you.”

“Baby said that?”

“Not exactly… she’s only a baby,” Gunnilda said, shaking her head. “Well, I guess what she said was that her Ma liked to make her Da cry, and laughed to see it. And I guess Elfleda told her things too… She told Baby that you didn’t love her—Baby, I mean—nor Elfleda neither. And I guess she told her you was real mean and you hurt her. Elfleda, I mean. But Baby didn’t believe it! I don’t, neither. I—”

“That will do,” he whispered, his eyes closed.

Gunnilda fell silent.

“What can I say?” he said after a while. “She was terribly unhappy. Perhaps that explains it.”

“That’s what Alwy says. Egelric, I should tell you something else. While you was away, Baby was real scared for a while that her Mama was going to come and take her someplace where you couldn’t find her. At night she would get up and come wake Alwy and ask him to look around and make sure Elfleda wasn’t outside. Me and Alwy would tell her that her Mama was dead and couldn’t come back, but—”

“That’s what she told me today.”

“Oh,” Gunnilda said, forgetting what she had been saying as she wondered what conversation between the little girl and her father could have led Baby to make that pronouncement.

“I think some of you is rubbing off on her, Gunnilda,” he smiled sadly. “She is growing very wise.”

“Oh, pish! Me? The silly old bird I am!”

“Yes, you! And what about you?” he asked, his voice softening as he lifted a hand to her cheek.

“Are you feeling unwell, or is it because of my thoughtlessness that you are hiding in your room?”

Of course, it had been because of how he had spoken to her earlier, but how could she be angry with him when he spoke to her in such a voice now? “Oh, it’s nothing at all,” she scoffed. “I’m just being lazy, is all.”

“Nonsense. I’m not saying you shouldn’t get some rest, I simply wondered whether I had hurt you so.”

“Oh! I deserved it,” she said lightly, but she wondered whether or not she were visibly trembling.

“Don’t ever think that!” He suddenly pulled her close.

“That was my mistake,” he whispered into her hair. “Don’t think it’s your fault if someone is cruel to you. If I am cruel to you, I mean. I’m terribly unhappy too, sometimes.”

“Oh, no!” she scolded, tightening her arms around him.

But he lifted his head. “Did someone just kick me?” he asked.

“Oh! I guess so!” she giggled breathlessly.

“He’s right,” he said, letting go of her. “‘Keep your hands off my Ma,’ he says. He’s right,” he continued, stepping away from her. “I shouldn’t be here. I should go. Gunnilda—”

“Yes?” she said weakly.

“May I leave Baby here for an hour or two?” he asked as he backed to the door. “I have to go see the king. Or perhaps—perhaps she’ll stay the night? It may take hours. I would—I will come tomorrow, at breakfast. I would like to see Alwy. Could you…?”

“Of course.”

“Good night then. I’ll see you and Alwy tomorrow morning. Good night.”

“Good night,” she said softly. She folded her hands over her restless belly and listened to Egelric saying good night to Iylaine and to Bertie. And then she heard the children return to their play, and the door open, and the door shut, and then he was gone.