Wulf asks a pertinent question

Egelric had not learned how to read until he was a man, and furthermore he had observed that writing was not the same thing as reading. He could have read the letter he was trying to write without much difficulty, but writing it in the first place was a challenge.

However, he always wrote his own letters when he wrote to his cousins. He would not send letters to his family written in his steward’s hand. But he would come down to the empty study after supper and write alone, so that no one – and especially not Luitgarde – would see how he struggled.

At the sound of a commotion in the passage outside, he quickly pulled the scrap of parchment on which he rested his hand up to cover the entire letter. It might be Ethelwyn, in which case it wouldn’t matter, but if it was Lili, he wouldn’t have her see his childish writing.

But it was neither Ethelwyn nor Lili who pushed open the door, but a little, naked, grinning elf.

“What’s this nonsense, boy?” Egelric cried. “What are you doing running around down here like a young pagan with your banner waving?”

Wulf laughed triumphantly.

Ethelwyn appeared in the doorway. “I thought I heard someone giggling down here,” he smiled.

“I got past you!” Wulf crowed.

“You got past everybody!” Egelric said. “Where’s your nurse?”

“She’s giving Gils a baf.”

“And I gather you were supposed to be getting a baf as well?”

“Aye!” he giggled. “But I dried me off.”

“You’re telling me you got your own self out of your baf?”

“Aye! I want to see you, Da.”

“That is the finest compliment you’ve ever been paid,” Ethelwyn laughed. “I didn’t think he liked anything better than his ‘baf.’”

“I like my Da better,” Wulf told him.

“As I said. Shall I take back him up, sir?” he asked Egelric.

“What do you want, boy?” Egelric asked.

“I want you to tell me a story, just for me.”

Egelric was, in fact, relieved to have an interruption from the bothersome business of letter writing. “Very well! But Gils shall choose the story at bedtime.”

“I know,” Wulf muttered, but in truth he was not at all disappointed with this arrangement.

“You may tell the nurse where he is, however,” Egelric said to Ethelwyn, and he got up and went to unroll the small deerskin before the fire so he and his son could sit. His knees were beginning to protest at such usage, but his father’s stories had always been told on the floor before the fire, and so, he swore, would his be.

“What sort of story shall it be?” he asked.

“Tell me how I was born,” Wulf said.

“I should have known,” Egelric sighed.

Once Wulf had understood that there was a baby much like little Bruni growing in Lili’s belly, he had wanted to know all about how such things were arranged. But what had stuck in his mind was the story of his own birth.

“Well,” Egelric began, “one night in the spring, when I was sleeping – ”

“You forgot the first part!” Wulf interrupted.

“What part?”

“First I was in Mama’s belly and grew and grew.”

“That’s right. And then one night I woke up, and Mama wasn’t there in the bed. And so I got up – ”

“First you waited and got scared.”

“That’s so. First I waited a while, and got scared because I didn’t hear her. So then I got up and got dressed – ”

“And she wasn’t in the kitchen.”

“No, she wasn’t in the house at all. So I got dressed and went outside, and first I asked my dog, and my dog didn’t know where she was.”

Wulf giggled. This was one of his favorite parts.

“And then my dog and I went to the shed and asked the horse. And the horse didn’t know where she was either. So then my dog and the horse and I – ”

“You forgot the knifes!”

“That’s right. First I went into the house and got my little black knife. And then I went to take my grandfather’s big knife, and it wasn’t there.”

“Because Mama took it!”

“Now you’re just getting ahead of the story, boy!” Egelric laughed. “So then my dog and my horse and I all set out looking for Mama. And we looked and looked all the rest of the night, and all through the day. And finally we came home in the evening because we didn’t know what else to do, and lo and behold, who did we find in the bed?”

“Mama!”

“That’s right! She was sleeping in the bed, all dirty and with twigs and leaves in her hair, just like my horse when he goes and rolls around in the dirt. And then I pulled back the blankets, and lo and behold, who did I find under there?”

“Me!” Wulf laughed.

“That’s right. Because Mama had been sneaky and went out into the woods to have her little baby all by herself.”

“Just like the cat!”

“But Lili means to have her little baby right here at home.”

“And cut the cord with grandfather’s knife like Mama did, and your Mama did.”

“I shall ask her to.”

Wulf sighed in contentment. And then he had another thought. “But, Da?”

“But what?”

“Do you love Lili?”

Egelric gasped. One never knew what was behind a child’s question, and one could easily say too much, or the wrong thing. “Of course I do, Wulf. Why do you ask me?”

“Because, will she get lost after the baby comes?”

“Get lost? Why would Lili get lost?”

“Because you said you always lose them, if you love them. Iylaine’s Mama, and my Mama, and the new baby’s Mama. That’s Lili,” he added helpfully.

Egelric was stunned. Surely he had never said such a thing in the boy’s hearing.

“Who told you that?” he asked.

“You told King Sigefrif. When he came. I heard.”

Egelric remembered how often Gunnilda had warned him about little ears.

“But you were in your room when we were talking about… that…” he said weakly.

“I know, but I can hear.”

It did not seem possible. He could scarcely hear the boys’ squeals when they were in that room – he could not comprehend how the boys could hear a quiet conversation before the fire in the other. And yet it was possible he had said something like that to Sigefrith.

“I think it’s time to take you up and put your pajamas on you, young pup,” Egelric said as he stood. He took Wulf into his arms and looked at him gravely. “But first, I shall tell you what I used to tell your sister: don’t listen to grown people talking, because you will only understand half, and that’s worse than none.”

“I know.”

“And furthermore, I do not intend to lose Lili either before or after the baby comes. We must simply keep an eye on her, and let her rest when she’s tired, and keep her happy and smiling. And then she won’t go away.”

“That’s good,” Wulf sighed happily. “Because I love Lili. More than my baf.”

“So do I,” Egelric smiled.

“More than your baf?”

“More than just about everything.”